your small wins matter

I sat on the floor of my bathroom with my head in my hands.  Honestly, I was in the same pair of yoga pants and tank top I’d worn for 2 days straight (including bedtime – y’all, I hadn’t changed in 2 days!) with my hair in a messy knot on top of my head.  I had spent the days cleaning, breaking up fights, wrestling kidlets to bed, trying to write something worth reading, sighing that my pants felt tight when I put them on, letting my kids watch more TV than playing outside, not cooking dinner (again), and feeling like one giant mess.

All the areas in life I am responsible for (my children, my home, my writing, ME in general) felt a bit chaotic.  I don’t mean horrible but more like I couldn’t pull any of it together.  It was like looking at a beautiful home that was covered in dirty clothes all the time; you can see the beauty of the home but most of it was hidden behind the mess.

And that’s what I felt my life was looking like.  I had all I’d ever wanted in my family and yet I couldn’t seem to see past the ways I was failing.  I could only see all the ways I couldn’t keep it together.

So, I sat on the bathroom floor in my 2 day old clothes, with the kids finally in bed, and as tears filled my eyes I muttered, “I just need a win.  Some win in even just one of the areas of my life.  In parenting.  Or in my writing.  Or in my own self.  I just need something to go right so I can feel like I actually did something useful and good today.”

In my head I knew I wasn’t a failure but my heart just struggled to believe it.  My heart felt like I wasn’t doing well enough.  It screamed at me I should be more.  I just wanted, no needed, a win to feel, well, accomplished.

I few days later I said similar words to a friend and she stopped me, “You do win.  Every day.”

I thought she clearly hadn’t heard what I just laid out before her so I began to tell her again how I fail and she said, “You need to look every day for a small win.  It’s there.”

And then that’s when I realized the Little Win.

What’s a Little Win?

It’s getting the bed made when it usually isn’t.  It’s choosing that apple over the chocolate bar.  It’s not yelling when the kids throw the world’s biggest fit.  It’s making it to work on time and setting a good example to the staff.  It’s getting to sleep at a decent time.  They are the mini accomplishments our every day lives are made of…

A Little Win is simply a small success you made and it should be celebrated.

Now, I know the Little Win isn’t as glamorous as a Huge Win like graduating college or finishing that marathon.  A Little Win isn’t as boastful as a Big Win like getting that job promotion or losing those stubborn 10 pounds finally.  But Little Wins are actually really important and you want to know why?

You will have a few Huge Wins in your life.

You will have many Big Wins in your life.

But you will have millions of Little Wins in your life.

All the Little Wins in your life add up and they will far outweigh all the Big and Huge Wins you will ever have.

And so, every day now I write down at least one of my Little Wins.  Because even if I didn’t make a Big Win today, I didn’t lose.  I had so many Little Wins I can take joy in.

Goals and dreams are good. Huge and Big Wins are awesome. But don’t forget the Little Wins. I encourage you to look for them today and everyday in your lives.

You will realize your small wins matter.

And that your Little Wins are really BIG.

And friend, everyday you got your win.

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